30th and the 31st of August.


30th of August 2009:

Woke up quite early because my mom wants me to accompany her to the market since its my nephew Ezekiel's first birthday and there were 4 families that is going to come to my house for buka. So, its like a small gathering for Ezekiel :)

I went home and bathe. After that I heard a loud MA MA MA. I went out of my room, and there he was. My mini me :) the apple of my eye and my sweetheart--Ezekiel :)
He was a little bit cranky because he just woke up from his nap and then knowing my family who was loud. He was awaken. My brother bought him a chu chu train that goes round and round on its track. It was cute btw. Ezekiel apparently did not played with the train, but the box -.-"

Since my other sister zaza and I have not bought a present for him yet. So, at 5.00pm we went to Subang Parade because theres toys r us there. Toys nowdays are so not fun ok! Its all about science and some stupid tembak2 thing that you can buy at a pasar malam. It was so not worth it. Then we decided to go to parkson. Parkson's was better. We bought him a mini basketball court where the basket can talk and keep scores. Killa cool!

And then, we went for glasses shopping. Well, at least my sister did. I had to wait. She was in that shop until 6.45pm!! We had not even wrapped the present yet. So, we went to the parkson customer service and ask this man to packed for us. Oh, how he took his own bloody time. To wrapped THAT ONE present took half an hour. It was then. 7.15

We rushed back home, thank you god that theres no jammed. Arrived home at 7.30 and then I took a sipped of tea and had to rush to solat berjemaah maghrib with the family. Oh and Atiq was there too because I invited him. Anyway, after solat I tried my moms Mac and Cheese and potato soup! Killer nice! And then we played with Ezekiel. He is very ACTIVE! Does not know how to stop! He opened his new present that my sister bought it for him. But he did not even play with it, he played with the box again! haha. The one who played the basketball mini court thingy was my brother and my cousin.

At 10pm, the house was empty. I sent Atiq back home. I was plannig to go out with Anne to celebrate Merdeka eve. Since she wants to go clubbing, so I turn down the offer because its Ramadhan and I'm tired.
31st August 2009:

I was awaken by my sister annoying voice-- "nick nick bangun!! nick nick bangun laaa. Teman I dgn sham pergi subang nk menang 5000 ni"
And being a good brother I am, I followed. There is this ogawa competition where you have to take a picture of you and an Ogawa product and send it with the most creative captions. So, we took some funny pictures. And then my sister went to buy that glasses she wants yesterday.

Went back home at 2.30 and I slept until 6.30pm. After buka, I helped my sister uploaded the pictures and edited it for her. We sent 5 pictures -.-" haha. But, I really think we can win them ALL! After my sister went to bed, then the line is clear for me to smoke. I had some ME time in my room, smoking and preparing for err.. yeah, SCHOOL! And now I'm blogging.

Oh, visit my tumblr. This is my un-anonymous tumblr :) SINCE everyone is asking for my tumblr. I made one un-anonymous. www.godasupernova.tumblr.com

Happy Merdeka Day :)

until then,

bloody hell!

Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you. Whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks, I will be right here waiting for you.

-right here waiting by richard marx-

I'm still sad though btw. I don't know why, wait. I do. But only god and Anne knows why. I need someone to hug me. Someone to really really tell me that I'm fine and I'm okay. Not just listening to my stories and tell me to chill and then get back to his/her life. Its not always about you, you know! Its not always about me either, although it should be. But unfortunately its not. I don;t like it when tears coming out of me. Its so sick! Its so emo! Its so not NICK! If its coming out over someones death is well, acceptable. But its for. GOSH! STUPID! Its for stupid reason okay. I hate being this way. Have I switched souls or what? This heavy weight in my heart, I can't take it no more. I need to break free. Its like I'm being chained. Its like I'm being JAILED!

This world is so small, I hate it. I am practically hating everything and everyone right now. I'm not usually this crazy emo bitch. But hay, a guy gotta cry. I've been listening to sad songs.

I'll be fine. I know that. I WILL be fine! If I don't then I'll be the new emo kid. But you know I will be fine. I know myself. I don't get sad often, and if I do I get over it A S A P!!

I need help..

until then,

parachute

Cut My Parachute

I'm feeling down. I won't tell you why, can someone help me? Its not often I post something when I'm down and feeling frown. Thank you ANNE for being there, I love you. Your the best? I don't usually feel down. But, this weight in my heart. I can;t help it! I need to get it off. I feel sad, this is not normal for me ok. I need ANNE? I mean, to talk to her not as in to have her. Siti's gone and being happy now. Its like we switch body. Its usually her thats being emo. Looks like Ms Happy Tree Friends is being happy while I'm being Secondhand Serenade.

Only Anne could understand how I feel.

until then, :(

if I was a rich man.

No one can impress me, my cash flow and never ever ends. Who said that money can't buy happiness they certainly don;t know where to shop :)

until then

baby you'll be famous.

I am not a bad influence, when I'm friend with someone its not my fault that they want to be bad. I can't blame them from wanting to be me. Its them who wants to be me :)

until then,

I've fallen into a black hole.

Anyway, my mom cooked mee curry and for desert, we had Bread pudding :) Yummy I know. I'm not a big fan of bread pudding because it has raisins in the bread. I like raisins as it is, not inside breads or cake.

After buka, I helped my mum clean the table. At 8.30, Anne pick me up and we went to the BBQ party. It was ok. But we only go there to show our face and then we went to Anne's house since her parents are not at home. We listen to music and eat and tell stories and dance. 

At 11, she sent me back home :)

Tomorrow, I have Buka plans with Siti  :)
She has gotten back with her boyfriend.. I'm happy for her :)

Oh and yeah, I have tumblr but its an anonymous blog.

until then,

This is so not normal.

Before you read this, I have to tell you and make it straight that I am STRAIGHT as a straight line could ever be. Ok anyway:

This happens about a week ago, I did not tell anyone about this because I thought I was just being paranoid. A friend of mine called me as in randomly from out of the blue kind of call. Lets say this friend of mine is named K. Ok, anyway he keeps calling me and wants to hang out with me and I said ok. So we did. Just me and him, I thought it was like a guy to guy bonding time. You know, talking about sports and stuff. And we did! We did talk about sports and chicks. And then, he started paying for everything! By everything I mean everything. Our lunch cost about RM60 including ciggarettes. He paid. Being NICK. I was happy, that a FRIEND would treat me like this.

So he sent me back home. 15 minutes later he called-- He asks me "Tengah buat apa?" and I was like "err. online?" and he was like "oh, online dgn siapa?" and I was like "kenapa kau tanya aku ni semua" and he was like "oh saja." Being NICK again. I really did thought it was a SAHAJA thing. The next day, we went out. But this time was near, it was at the clubhouse. He wanted to pay, I said no. But he did.

He called me six times everyday. Sometimes seven or eight or even 12! Excluding rejected calls and missed calls. This was getting real weird. I mean, it was real weird.

And this confession came:

K, 12am--texted me;

"I never hang out with someone like you. I never met anyone like you and your kind of different from the other guys and I really like your style. I like your kind of guy"

I was a speechles bitch! This was really scary man. So, I started telling him straight stuff.

Nick, 12.30am--texted him;

"Ok, as a friend I would like to tell you that I thought you were straight. I mean, I never know you were this TYPE. I'm sorry but I'm straight and this is really weird for me. Please, stop calling me six times a day and spend your money on me. I might just say no. And, lets get things straight. IF you ever say that you like me again. I would punch you straight and I would find a gay guy for you and ask him to fuck you stupid! You get that? thank you."

K, 1.00am--texted me:

"oh I'm sorry. But, please don;t let THIS comes between our friendship." bla bla bla. this stupid gay men texted me.

And I was like. Malas nak layan. I blocked him from myspace and facebook. I deleted his messages and phone calls and phone number. He is just a virus. Like I said, I have no problems with gay men. As long as they don't be gay to me :)

This goes to all GAY friend of mine out there. Please don't try me, I;m not your type. I may act or look gay but I'm straight as a straight line could ever be.

until then,

rumors

Rumors spread so fast.

2nd day of ramadhan.

I've just finish my Buka :) which was awesome btw. My mom cooked Baked Cheese Potato and Butter Sauce Fish Fillet and the regular rice with lauk lauk. BURP! I had good food :)

I plan to go for terawikh today but mum went on and had forgotten about me. :/
At about 9.30pm, I will be meeting Atiq and Faqiha at Faqiha's house. Now, I feel like smoking. damn it!

I have to teman my cousin at my house while her parents and my mom is at the mosque. But that's okay. At least I have company :)

until then,

1st day if ramadhan

put your hands on my waist,

Anyway, today was very tiring? And surprisingly, I did nothing. I wake up at 5, sahur and planned to have my subuh prayers but I slept until 3. Then, I was very very dizzy since I'm use to eating after waking up. I went online. But that was really boring. So, I went to the tv and watch disney channel. GAHH!

At 6.30, after Phineas and Ferb. hehe. I went and took a bath. At 7pm, I dried my hair and help mum set the table. 24 minutes after that. I had one whole jug of ice tea. It was heaven!! My mum cooked Kari Indonesia--which was AWESOME! And sup daging with french toast and my sister bought Ikan Bakar from the bazaar. Food never tasted so good. :)

Then I went to my room, for my maghrib prayers and read some verses from the quran and then I went online while eating my desert. Which was mom's famous pengat jagung. Well not famous. But famous to me :)

But, I'm still having migrane now. GAHH! maybe I put too much ajinamoto at my soup. That explains.

Planned to go for terawikh. But my mum did it at home. So, I did not go for terawikh neither did I do it at home. At 10.00pm, I feel like lighting up with my new pack of ciggs. So, I did. GAH! Was that heaven.. Its unhealthy but yeah its heaven. The saddest part about that is, no one to remind me of death everytime I smoke. That is Atiq. This guy, don't smoke. So, he reminds people about death when people start to smoke. But no one listen.

Next time.

But I use to go to the taman with him at night and light up. Now, he is far away. hmph.

anyway, happy sahur!

until then

Ramadhan

"Sahaja aku berpuasa pada seluruh bulan Ramadhan tunai kerana Allah ta'ala"

Thats my niat, I don't go with the NAWAITU thingy because I don't understand it. As long as we niat and it comes from the heart. Then thats fine :)

What I love about Ramadhan is of course the home cook food that my mom always cooked for us. She does not cook rice on Ramadhan, I don't know why. But since I was little, my mum would only cooked rice with various lauk at sahur. Not buka. She would cook something western, italian, Mediterranean, arabic, chinese and indian for buka. I love it when she make her famous mash potatoes. Its better than chillies. Trust me. I love the cous cous with steak and erm, the soups! Everyday is a different soup. My favorite would be the potato and pea soup.

Is it me, or is the night of Ramadhan seems different? Every night in Ramadhan seems very peaceful, harmless and IDK there is this special thing about it that makes me calm. 

OMG! So many buka plans with friends. I'm so effin short of money right now though. 

Anyway, I will try my best and my hardest to puasa for one month! Lets try to be a better muslim now shall we? 

until then,

the reason why I'm single.

No. Its not because I'm gay or bisexual. Its just that I'm real fussy about girls. I like mine to be perfect. I mean at least close to perfect. Now here is my type of girl:

  1. SHE has to look pretty, beautiful and hot
  2. SHE have to be stylo. Its a must.
  3. TALL. Not so tall, a lil bit shorter than me.
  4. Long hair with nice smell
  5. Speak proper english. So she can communicate well.
  6. Independent and strong. You got to have the confidence.
  7. I like them tan. But mostly white.
  8. I want them skinny. Because I'm skinny.
  9. The got to have the body.
  10. They know how to dance in a party-- Appropriately. Not in a slutty kind of way.
  11. They got to have a very very good voice to sing with me.
  12. Have to be smart not bimbo-ish.

If you could find any of these for me. It means that you have found my soulmate.

Its goodbye.


Ok, its pretty stupid for me to be emotional right now. But Atiq has moved. Not a different school but a different house. He was only my neighbour for a year and alot has change and experienced. The reason he moved to the same apartment is because his old house was being renovated into a mansion with 8 rooms.

If I am short of test pads or stationaries, theres no more Atiq to be there on the 4th floor. When I;m bored at night and need someone to hang out with he would not be as near as before. No one to watch me smoke. No one to talk about death to when I;m smoking. Well, what I'm trying to say is. No one near. No one to cover for me when I'm sneaking out and most of all no more partner in crime at night with him. As he'll be hundreds of footsteps away not like before when I only needed the lif to get to his house.

But, I still see him at school though anyway.

But, it'll not be the same. We studied here together when the PMR is near. We got our perfect tans here by the pool. We drove the car for the first time here. In Sri Permata. Well, who knew a year could bring so many memories.

well, to Atiq and family:

Happy Moving and you'll see this face almost everyday at your mansion. And everyday also when Mr and Mrs Abdullah is going to Hajj. hehe. KIDDING!

Anyway, Happy Moving and I'm sorry for not being such a big help to your family.

ciao.

until then,

Its life in the city.

I'm going to be a VJ first then Public Relation and then a fashion designer.

I'll make an empire soon.

Remember me when I'm famous

until, then

I would be the first :)

My school does not have a queen bee or even a king bee. Which is good. Which means that I could be the first King Bee.

All Hail King Nick.

And since so many people is like want to be me. I really do fit to be a King Bee. haha.

No. I tak perasan. Like those form 5. They said bad things about me wearing my big and cool glasses. Guess what? They are wearing it the next week. I'm such a role model right?

And Yasmin is bit by bit becoming like me. hehe. She even said that I'm her mentor on her blog. And Atiq, sometimes follow my fashion sense, wears my clothes. Even my bags.

ok. Lets check:

I have possies, I'm a role model, I get invited to almost all parties and I'm a bitch.

hahahaha. So, I'm the first king bee :)

until then,

p/s-dont layan me.

when you fight bitches with Nick-- Nick wins :)

My friend Atiq could be annoying at certain times. Yes its true. But that does not mean that some people could treat him like he is not human. Well, he keeps telling me about a certain someone who treats him like shit. That someone is one of his classmates. Although you did nothing to me, but Atiq is me friend. TREAT HIM WELL.

This is what they did to Atiq.

When Atiq was sleeping at Physics, one of them stomp her pencil box right in front of his face. Well, I know its not good to sleep in class but its not good to be rude either. She sometimes even yelled at Atiq saying that she is sick of him. What did he do? Like I said, he is annoying at times. Maybe I understand you. But even I don't treat people like that. No wonder the WHOLE class hates you. Seriously not lying. I told my friends about what you did. And they hate you too!

News flash! This just in---well for you maybe. Because my mom told me to be nice to others. The TV even told us to be nice to eachother. Have not you heard the phrase BUDI BAHASA BUDAYA KITA? Being a BITCH like you is not cute at all. Sorry to say.

But if you hurt Atiq one more time. You are going down. VERY DOWN!

I did not say that I am perfect. But you think you are so perfect. Guess what? Your not! Tolong la, treat people nicely if you want the world to treat you nice pulak. Really, karma works.

And who the hell are you to tell someone you are sick of THEM? Who the fucking hell are you man?!! We are the ones who should be the fucking shit sick of you! People like you should not be in this world. Tolong la. Please don't be a childish freak and a bitch. Your not like the REGINA GEORGE type if bitch. At least she's pretty. Your like the big fat ugly bitch who wants to be Regina george.

Guess what?! I'm a bigger bitch if I want to be.

siapa makan cili, cepat cepat la pergi minum air.

until then,

new class

Monday madness.

Today was not a fun day. I did not come for one week, the next thing I know my class has been change to another place. If it is better than my other class, then thats fine. The thing is, its much more worst! The fan is not working very well. And the sun rises from the right side of the window and that makes the class much more hotter. The windows frame has been eaten by termites and its just so dusty! I hate that class. The reason we change class is because its much more easier for the teachers to MEMANTAU this class than our old class. Teachers are selfish lazy bitches. I mean not all. But you guys would know who the hell that I'm talking about. yes. its MISS R. I hate her. I do. I mean, as an individual she would be ok. But as a teacher shes not.

well, she gives me HELL.

until then,

oh man. shes hot.

Nick waved.

M-Hyeee, I'm Marsha.
N-Hyee, I'm Nick

When I was queuing. There was this girl staring and smiling at me. And shes REAL hot and stylish. My type. So, I smile. and she smiled back. I know her, met her somewhere. But where?

masa balik. Ternampak lagi. I ask her name, it was Marsha. Masa nak mintak number, tak sempat. DAMN IT!

Then, I saw her on the escalator. She was with her boyfren which was not hotter than me. So yeah wtvr. She waved at me for no reason. Then, I wave back. After that, it was the end of my love at first sight.

ah damn!

until then,

p/s-stylish,pretty,hot and beautiful eyes.

WORLD STAGE!


It was a last minute thing. I swear!
Anyway, I went there at 3. Surprisingly, there was not much people when I queue for the line. I was so scared that I could not find my friends. But then, I saw Muzzamel and Muadzam. I ask them if they saw Yasmin and they said Yasmin was at the front of the stage. I squeeze myself to the stage. And there she was. We screamed! haha. After that, we hugged and wait.

Standing up for 2 hours with no fresh air with rain was not fun. So, I went to Muzzamel and Muadzzam and chill with them at the back. Sabrina, Kiestina, Shasha, Azwan and Fitrah were there too. Eyh, wait. Fitrah was at the front with Yasmin. OK anyway. A few minutes later. Estranged perform.

I was ready to dance like hell. But my friends were boring. And I'm scared to go to Yasmin again because now its like PACKED! So, I went to chill with them at the back while listening to estranged. Another few minutes later, it was BOYS LIKE GIRLS! OMG! They were awesome!! I'm not a big fan. But yeah, they're awesome! I wish Aqeel were here to see them. But hey, they are coming here soon!! Maybe next year. I dance like hell when they sang "the great escape." Well at that time, my friends was not boring anymore. haha. We jumped and banged our head. we rock the night.

Anyway, after that there was an hour break. Yasmin and Fitrah went to the back and sat with use. They were all sweaty. After the break it was Raygun! OMG they are ok la. HAHA. But I dance like hell to their music too!! hehe. Anyway, after Raygun was Miss Pixie Lott. I only know what song. And that is MAMA DO. haha. That was went my throat was hurt. Now, my voice sounds real deep and sexy. Its like puberty all over again.

After Miss Pixie Lott. Theres another hour break. So, I went to the back again and chill. Saw a few of my friends, aquaintances and schoolmates there too. Dance to the dj's music which was boring anyway. But, I'm full of energy.
AFTER THAT WAS MY FAVORITE FAVORITE BAND!! THE ALL AMERICAN REJECTTSSSS!!!!

I dance, scream, head bang and went crazy sampai my friends pun terkejut. HAHA. I know the lyrics to their songs from first to last. I was sweating like I never sweat before. After that, it was another 30 minutes break. Then, I saw my sister.

A few minutes later, it was Kasabian. I only know one song from this band which is FIRE and it was awesome btw. When Kasabian perform, my friend Azrieman carried me on his shoulder and I got to actually see them! It was awesome!!

And then, at 12. The Concert was coming to an end. There were explosion on the stage and the volcano. IT WAS SUPER DUPER AWESOME!

until then,

blogger boy.

I'm watching an episode of blogger boy. The last episode that I watch from this show was about a gay teen running away from home because his father caught him hiding porn magazines, cd and stuff(s) like that. Not normal porn. Gay porn.

And, after watching the show. I really did thought it was gay.

Todays episode was about the blogger boy's ex-girlfriend who married a gay men.

This show has written GAY all over it.

Anyway, I am glad to tell you that I'm H1N1 free! Although, I still have my fever. As long as I dont have the disease. I'm watching project runway right now. This show really do inspire me to be a fashion designer and also me avoiding the fashion industry. Its full of gay men. I'm scared.

until then,

OMG no! this is crazy!


I actually miss school.

Anyway, it has been more than 24 hours and I'm still waiting for my blood test results. I feel so unlucky. I hate being sick.

I'm avoiding listening to the american rejects for now because it hurts me so bad that I'm not going to World Stage. I hate being sick.

I miss hanging out with my friends, I miss my school friends! I miss my cigarettes and also missing me singing in front of the whole class. I hate being sick.

I miss Siti, Atiq, Sya, Nikki, Yasmin and my classmates. I hate being sick.

I miss gossiping using my mouth and not typing. I hate being sick.

I miss my art tuition that now, I actually forgot how to draw. I hate being sick.

I miss the OUTSIDE world.

how could it be so mean to me. I'm just shock, that the moment when I got my world stage tickets, I can;t go. I'm not sad about me being quarantine. Its just that why now?! Why quarantine NOW?! The worst part about this is.. Yes, I got the mosh pit tickets.

I've given that away to someone who wants it.

I'm stuck here untill Sunday.

did I mention that I hate being sick?

until then,

I have a long way to go.

What am I waiting for? I should have taken the chance. I'm such a stupid ho..

Anyway, this just in-- My brother is getting married next year in the month of June. And, NO I'm not wearing a traditional baju melayu. In fact, my brother is going to pay for my Tailor Made suit! yeay ME! Oh and yeay my brother too :)

I'm not sure what fabrics to buy and what looks good on me. But, I'm thinking about wearing what Nick Jonas wears in the MTV VMA's. Thats kind off cool too. Since my mom forbids me wearing like Chuck Bass, she said he looks like JOKER from bat man. But, I'm still getting a Baju Melayu for the nikah and the other reception. Who cares about being best men anyway, since obviously I'm going to be THE BEST MEN there. 

I love it when one of my siblings get married.  The rehearsals, food tasting, family meetings and stuff  like that.

I can;t wait to start!

until then,

Its not fair.


Are your secrets where you left them? I don't remember you told me not tell anybody. Well, oopss. I just did.

until then,

Demam. Worried and afraid.

I had a fever since saturday. On Sunday, I went to the clinic. The long queue and those little annoying children running around makes my fever much more worst. The doctor was rude too. She did not even check me properly. So, she gave me antibiotic and panadols.

Medicines are almost finish, still no changes. At 4.30am, I went to my moms room because I was cold eventhough the fan was not on. She said that I had a high temperature and so, she sponge bath me. Apparently, I was not feeling better at all. I felt the same. Cold, tired, body aches and gosh! coughing, sneezing and diarhea. What does that tells you in your mind?

So, today I went to the clinic again. This time, its a better clinic. The doctor said that I am quarantine until wednesday because I may be having you-know-what or dengue. I'm scared. YES! I hope by wednesday, I'll be perfectly fine or else--MY FIRST BLOOD TEST!

until then,

p/s-my mum said that I should be thankful that god give me sickness. It means he is erasing all of my sins. WOW! Banyak nya dosa aku.

pfft, I am


Those form 5, some of them are hypocrites. They talk bad about me when I wear that big glasses but look at them now. Following me much? Well at least, they have great fashion sense to follow what I do. I can't blame me for being a trend setter.

ur taking back whos love?

I am so cool that you are never cooler than me :)

Anyway, today was an OKAY day. Went to school and went back home, slept and then watch tv and eat.

FUN! I know!!

Urgh, there is someone on my facebook who is related to me that cannot be trusted. Because my aunt knew that I drove and shes being so annoying about it.

Oh, and there is this classmate of mine. They are such a desperate wannabe. 2 of them la. I mean, they said that I budak baru nk UP. If you don;t know what that means, it means that I am just a guy who JUST tried everything and being so 'OMG' abt it. But, they are the ones in CLASS who said that they tried cocaine and stuff and being so BATAK about it which makes it ovbvious that they never tried any of that stuff. Its just influence by my other friends. PITY them, lets laugh!

They think that ONCE you have gotten in a club, ONCE you have been into a party and ONCE you've sneak out the house makes you cool. But you only try it once at 16! I've been through that stage before when I was 13. And now, I'm slowing down because I've grown! When you have just started. Siapa yg baru nak UP sekarang?

Do you know what they say about you? They said that you are a desperate wannabe. They said that you think your the COOLEST person in this whole entire section 9 that no one is cooler than you. Wake up slutface! and guess what?! I'm cooler than you.

tak payah ah nak batak sangat telling everyone that you tried this and that when I know that you have never tried them.

But on the other hand, its fun watching you being a wannabe. You social climber!

tata!

until then,